Do you have any resources for
someone facing sexual harassment in the work place?
He has not come onto me,
but will rub my shoulders sometimes as he walks past. Or has asked me very
inappropriate questions.
I do not want him to get in trouble, but I feel like
it’s wearing on me. He’s part of management, and I’m the front desk girl. He’s
known the owners & my coworkers for 15 years. I’m the youngest there being
21 & they are all 35 and older.
I feel intimidated to bring it up because
he will convince everyone I took it the wrong way and it will make me look bad.
#LAVENDER sisterhood answer:
Welcome to living under “Patriarchy”!
Every woman in the workplace will deal with this same situation. This is the reality of the work
environment you, we, us must live in.
You can do the right thing and lose your job. You can be labelled a trouble maker like Anita Hill or Erin Brocovich. There is glory in pushing feminism forward but you can’t fault a woman who puts her children’s financial stability first.
Who is your role model?
Some
endured great rejection for their choices and file cases. Others endure demeaning work
environments for years for the greater good of their children’s living environment.
Which fits your personality & self-esteem better?
For me, I dreaded going to work. Due to my prior assaults, it felt like my secretarial chair was my cage and I was bait waiting for his attempts to assault me. I fought, lost, and left my job. My health did not allow me to tolerate it for long.
You have flexibility to make your life better,
you just don’t have the power to magically zap the patriarchy & misogyny
out of your work environment.
-
YES, I want you to stand up for yourself,
-
BUT, it’s
emotionally exhausting on your mental health
-
HOWEVER, I promise you, there’s another
one right behind it, so you might as well start to practice, standing up for yourself & others at work, if you want this to end
But I realize you want a concrete answer:
Try this test. Go to management or human resources and gently say some of your observations. Whatever their first reaction is? that is your answer.
If they double-down on defensiveness, the entire company will protect him and simply say you are sorry and leave the office with your tail between your legs. Minimal career damage. Abort.
If they take you seriously and say they will look into it. It may trigger them to just “talk to him” and that will be enough because most companies don’t want to be sued.
You Won! … but there’s always caveats
If he’s an older man, he’ll be insulted and possibly verbally vindictive. Patriarchy “has been know” to punish via perceptions of your work performance. Shifts get cut. Mistakes are brought to your attention.
EQUALITY presently means you have the right to sit across from a lawyer trying to convince them to take your “hostile work environment” case.
It starts with EOE but they only take big company cases and default all the others to “yes you have a case, go find a lawyer.”
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